Spitting Window
by Disturbed-Mort
Summary: What Does Hannibal Lector And Shooters Talking Story Have To Do With Mort? Find Out! A Parody


My Little Parody Of Secret Window, Hope You Like it!

Mort is in his car, deciding whether or not to confront his whore of a wife who sleeps with other men.

**'What the hell do I do....what do I do....what do I do....what do I do? - _Mort_**

**'I dont care what you do as long as we get good reviews for this movie!' - _Morts Mind_**

**'Should I go or shouldnt I? Go or not? Go or not? Go or not.....' - _Mort_**

**'DO FRICKEN ROCK PAPER SCICCORS FOR GOD SAKES!' - _Morts Mind_**

**'Oh yeah so which one are you going to pick?' - _Mort_**

**'I'm not supposed to tell you dumbass!' - _Morts Mind_**

**'Hey your supposed to be on my side, not calling me names!' - _Mort_**

__sniffles and starts hitting head on dashboard__

**_'Stop that! Before you give us brain damage!' -_ _Morts Mind_**

_**'Oh my god your right!' - Mort**_

_**'GGRR, just do the damn rock paper sciccors.' - Morts Mind**_

__Does Rock Paper Sciccors__

_**'This is stupid just leave!' - Morts Mind**_

__Mort drives in reverse and goes back to the hotel__

__Looks in rear veiw mirror__

_**'I DIDNT BRUSH MY TEETH, DEAR LORD, I CANT SHOW MYSELF!' - Mort**_

_**'Well thats your fault isnt it?' - Morts Mind**_

_**'Oh shut up.' - Mort**_

__Mort crashes into the hotel while the manager screams

_**'What the hell is a matter with you? You stupid wacko!' - Manager**_

Mort searhes through the rubble to find keys

_**'You dork, why dont you just crash into the room. You'd kill your slut wife and the guy she's sleeping with, kill two birds with one stone!' - Morts Mind**_

Mort pays no attention to his mind and finds the keys. Gets back into car

Mort parks car and goes into room, see's Amy with another man and screams in they're faces

_**'OH MORT, YOU WERENT SEXY ENOUGH FOR ME! I'M A WOMEN, I HAVE NEEDS!' - Amy**_

_**'Dude, you didnt brush your teeth! Dude....' - Ted**_

_**'Oh well I guess I'll have to settle for a little cabin in the middle of nowhere drinking Moutain Dew and eating Doritos.' - Mort**_

Manager comes in

_**'What the hell is going on in here?' - Manager**_

The manager see's Ted and Amy in bed and slowly back out of the door

_**Many Months Later, Maybe A Year** _

__

Camera zooms in over the lake as its submerged in water

_**'Hey! Dude, wake up you dropped that damn 1000 dollar camera in the water!' - Cameraman 1**_

_**..Man....Sorry....Man....Man....Man....Like....Dude....' - Cameraman 2**_

Camera zooms to the cabin and threw the window, Morts on the couch

_**'You must stop dreaming about Maid Mort, the fangirls are getting scared' - Morts Mind**_

All the little fangirls are all huddled into a corner, shivering

Mort groans and rolls over

Hears knock on door

_**'Ah I gotta get up, ggrr.' - Mort**_

Knocking becomes more rapid

_**'I'm coming you stupid innoportune idiot.' - Mort**_

Opens Door To Reveal Hannibal Lector

_**'Well hello Clairice' - Hannibal**_

_**'WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?' - Mort**_

_**'You know who I am Clairice, its Hannibal, your little lover boy.' - Hannibal**_

_**'Dude I think you have the wrong movie...' - Mort**_

_**'Isnt this Hannibal?' - Hannibal**_

_**'No its Secret Window.' - Mort**_

_**'Oh sorry about that.' - Hannibal**_

Hannibal walks down porch and trips

Mort closes door and goes back to the couch to lay down

Knocking comes back, Mort goes to the door

_**'I got a bone to pick with you Mr. Rainey.' - Shooter**_

See's rip in Morts House coat and smiles

_**'Was I interuppting something?' - Shooter**_

Shooter winks suggestivly

Morts slams the door and drops the can of Moutain Dew he was holding all over his pants

Knocking comes back and Mort opens the door

_**'I wasent finished Morty' - Shooter**_

_**'Hey wasent that Ted's line?' - Morts Mind**_

_**'Oh god i dont know.' - Mort**_

Shooter looks down at Morts pants

_**'Morty, do you have a little bladder problem?' **_

_**'HELL NO! I JUST SPILLED MOUTAIN DEW ALL OVER ME!' - Mort**_

_**'Sure, you can call it whatever you want to call it.' - Shooter**_

_**'Anyway you said you had a bone to pick or something.' - Mort**_

_**'You stole my Barney story, and that was a good story!' - Shooter**_

_**'I never wrote a story with Barney...' - Mort**_

_**'Oh.....'**_

Camera turns around to the set where the cue cars are being held, the cue cards change, and the scene switches back to Mort and Shooter

_**'Oh sorry, you stole my story, Secret Window!' - Shooter**_

_**'DID NOT! I STOLE IT FROM THAT LOON STEPHEN KING!' - Mort**_

_**'You did steal my story!' - Shooter**_

Hands Mort the story

_**'Hell no!' - Mort**_

Hands it back

_**'Hell yes!' - Shooter**_

_**'Hell no!' - Mort**_

_**'Hell yes!' - Shooter**_

Mort kicks Shooter in the nads

_**'OOhh like that hurt....' - Shooter**_

Mort is confused and crys

Shooter looks around

_**'Wheres my story?' - Shooter**_

_**'Under my ass' - Mort**_

_**'And you dont think I'll go there?' - Shooter**_

Mort hands Shooter his story

_**'Well I'll be seeing you later, oh yeah and dont trip over the rock that I am going to put on your front porch with my story under it.' - Shooter**_

Shooter goes back into his car and Mort takes the story

_**'God damn stupid story' - Mort**_

_**'HEY DONT CALL ME NAMES! I'M BETTER THAN YOU!' - Shooters Story**_

Shooters story gives Mort a big huge papercut

Mort runs inside and quickly throws it in the trash'

Heres the story talking

_**'What the hell?' - Mort**_

_**'YOUR GOING CRAZY, I KNEW IT, I KNEW IT!' - Morts Mind**_

_**'And do I have to remind you that you are supposed to be on my side?' - Mort**_

_**'No I am quite aware of that little fact.' - Morts Mind**_

_**'And I am not going crazy....' - Mort**_

_**'But your talking to yourself.' - Morts Mind**_

_**'Am I?' - Mort**_

_**'Jesus Christ.' Morts Mind**_

TBC!

Hope Ya'll Liked That!


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